Written by Liz Abram


Self-Reliance is Key to a Vigorous Life

A badass knows what they are capable of, when to delegate and how to pay

Be tuned in to your own expectations, abilities and limitations and don’t be too proud to accept that, sometimes, enlisting someone else to help you get shit done is an efficient use of your precious time and energy. The results can be spectacular if we allow others to shine on our behalf.

Give credit for all the support you take on board.

Self-reliance also means that, once you have taken time to consider where you are heading, you have your own ideas on what you want and how to get it. Develop faith in yourself and trust in others. Learn what is important to you and discard any frivolous tat that clogs you up, slows you down, clouds your vision and pisses on your fire.

Keep Your Powder Dry

What you don’t say is sometimes more powerful in what you do say

Work on formulating your thoughts in private and learn the discipline of keeping at least some of them to yourself. You don’t have to grow up in public – save yourself the embarrassment!

Speak your mind only when you consider this to be truly required – but be confident enough to know when to shut the fuck up and quietly get on with your own endeavours.

Some will notice, while others may not see you. So what if they don’t? “The world is changed by your example, not your opinion”

Your job is to quietly get on with living your best life, for you and by you alone.

Lean in to the Light

Or be the light

Learn what fulfils and inspires you and lean in to that. Don’t waste time and energy hanging out with people that suck the life force out of you like a Dementor’s kiss. And stop pissing about wondering whether you are good enough. Go do it, test yourself, learn and improve. Talk less, do more (see note above) and laugh at yourself while you learn.

Be Kind (Not Soft)

Don’t be a twat

Badass does not mean arsehole

Be full enough of positive energy to afford kindness to others. (It is your job as a badass to maintain and replenish your own energy.) Pay forward. Help others feel good about themselves, for no other reason than it makes the world a better place and you a better person.

Unkindness, being mediocre, bitchy, small-minded or mean is for weak people. Badass is neither weak nor selfish.

So remember your own vulnerabilities and use them to open up and help others with their journey. 

Trust Your Gut

The closed door is a figment of your imagination.

The gut does not imagine anything. It knows (for that is where Badass lives…)

Who needs the drama of breaking down doors when you can create your own archway and glide through like a complete queen?

If an imaginary door refuses to open, sure you can try and kick it down in a dramatic and heroic fashion, but you’re going to feel like an arse unless you have sufficient minerals and Chutzpah to ensure you emerge on the other side in a blaze of glory (often to find you kicked down the wrong bloody door)

Maybe you could take stock, quietly amass the skills and confidence to cope with what’s on the other side whilst taking a step back to appreciate the wider view. Think about what it is you really want and know what you have to offer until you instinctively know where to point your face! With sufficient peripheral vision and self-belief, you will notice the open archway just a stone’s throw away from the door you’ve been trying to bash down.

The closed door was just a figment of your imagination. The archway appears once you KNOW what you want (listen to your gut). Take a peek through it, gather your wits and glide

What Other People Think of You is None of Your Business

Read that again.

Live by it.

Be that Badass

Liz is a former RAF officer, and an Army wife for 20 years. She is a former Interrogator, and is currently 1 of 3 interrogators on the hit TV show SAS Who Dares Wins. She is an intuitive and effective coach and you can check her work at the following site: http://www.lizabram.co.uk/